WHAT THE???

OK... so first of all let me start off with how the hospital went.

Mum and I got there bright and early at the women's and children's blood collection clinic, only to be told that all the staff in that area had called in sick! So we had to go to the other blood clinic which is a 'sit in and wait' kind of thing.

There were many many people cramped and squished on this long uncomfortable wooden bench outside the waiting room! This bench was where me and mum were to wait for AT LEAST 2 hours while I had my glucose test! NOT COMFY AT ALL!

I was already very agitated and absolutely STARVING as I had been fasting for the 10hrs before that. Actually to be honest, I hadn't eaten at all for the last 24 hours because I was feeling extremely sick all day before, and by the time I was actually hungry, it was too late... it was time to fast!

So I was really crook, and now had to wait even longer to even start my test, as it was now first in best dressed and not via appointment. (and there were A LOT of people in front of me, just for one off blood tests.) I was actually the only one out of all of these people that was there for a glucose test, so i was a little disappointed that they couldn't get me started asap.

And there was only ONE poor nurse that had to look after us all! She was very lovely and helpful, but gosh I felt so bad for her as she had no one to help her!

The only entertaining part, was watching the looks on each face of the people who would come around the corner to find the room packed! Some looked like they had just stood in dog poo, others stood like a frozen dear in head lights wondering whether they should stay or come back NEXT YEAR!, but most people just looked as though they just sh*t a brick and kept walking! (Thank heavens because that would have been more people we had to wait for!)

Because an emergency appointment was made for me at the W&C clinic, I didn't need any paper work, but now that we were in a different section, we now had to wait for someone to bring us a form to fill out before they would even CONCIDER putting me in line. So that meant that the more people who came in... the longer we had to wait.

After waiting an hour and still no sign of this 'form' Mum confronted the lady for answers, because by this stage I couldn't even stand I was so weak! But the nurse felt so bad for us that she actually bent the rules by putting me through without paper work! She told me that she could get in so much trouble for it, but she could see I was getting restless and decided to let me get started with it. So information was scribbled on a piece of paper for the time being.

First she took my fasting blood test and handed me this horrid green glucose drink to scull! (It was HIDEOUS!) It tasted like pure lime cordial that WASN'T watered down. YUCK!

Then the actual waiting began... I had to sit still for an hour on that horrid wooden bench until my next blood test.

I became really nauseated and restless, felt like I was going to faint, or vomit or both. I kept getting hot and cold flushes, so this glucose drink obviously was not reacting well with my body.

An hour later it was time for my next blood test. She used my other arm this time, but had trouble finding my vein!! So in and out and in out out the needle would go! It was awful! Then!! When she finally found the vein... the suction on the syringe was apparently broken, so when she tried pull it out, something went very wrong and the needle actually broke and bent in my arm!! It was soooo painful!

She said that the needle must have been really old... and then got a new syringe and was successful finally with another vein! But Boy have I got a big bruise from that one!

So another hours wait, and feeling more and more faint (and my arm aching!) Eventually it was time for my last test.

Meanwhile the form STILL hadn't arrived.. so she got Mum to go and fetch it for her (should have done that in the first place!)

For the third blood test she had to use the other arm, because she mangled the one before! But it was quick and easy this time. Then she quickly jotted everything down on the form, and quickly entered all the info into the computer system (she was extremely rushed off her feet.) And finally we were free to go! Where we would wait to hear the results via a phone call the next day.

There was one concern I had about this whole thing and that was that they never asked me for my Pregnancy Health Record. (Which is a little green book that all pregnant patients must have with them all the time, and all information is to be read and stored into this booklet, to keep track of everything.)

But no body asked for it, so I found that quite strange.

But anyways... after getting some food in my belly and going home for a huuuuge sleep, I was feeling much better!

Now let me tell you about how slack that Midwife of mine is...

The next morning I woke up to find a message on our answering machine from my Midwife who had left the message one hour before.

It said "Hi ummm, Giggle is it? It's Slackbitch from the hut here... listen your test results have come back and they are extremely elevated so I'm going to need you to call me back ASAP.... or what ever... on this number... *reads number*"

So I start getting anxious again, and I get straight on the phone and try to call her! But the phone rings about 3 times and then is disconnected (it was obvious she had deliberately hung up the call.) I got really cranky, because that is rather a rude thing to do, so even though it was obvious she didn't want to talk to anyone, I tried ringing again and again anyway!

Finally she rudely answered... "YES? WHAT IS IT?!!" I was stunned! But replied "Oh.... hi... it's Giggle, you had left a message for me to call you urgently about my test results?" She said "Oh yes! I'm just busy at the moment, I'll call you back later!" *She hangs up*

So I waited a couple hours anxiously for her call, and finally she returns it...

Her: "Hi Giggle, sorry about that, I was just catching up with an old friend!"

(I'm thinking... oh... that sounds important! Too busy to give me urgent results because you are catching up with an old friend!!!!)

Me: "That's ok... I was just anxious to hear this emergency?"

Her: "Yes, your results have come back extremely elevated, so you need to make an appointment with the hospital urgently for a glucose test!"

Me: "Sorry hang on... so I have to go have another test at the hospital?"

Her: "Huh? WHat do you mean another? Your test was here, it came back 9.5"

Me: "Oh wait a minute, so you're talking about the results from the test you gave me last Thursday?"

Her: "Yeah, what else would I be talking about?"

Me: "Listen, I waited anxiously for your call all Friday for those results, and in the end I gave up and called myself to find out. Another lady helped me out and booked me an appointment at the hospital, which I have since already done, and now I'm waiting anxiously for the NEW results which I thought were what you were talking about."

Her: "Oh what a good girl!!!" You're onto it arent you?!"

(I'm thinking, Um yes!!! Better than you ya slack B*tch!)

Me: "Oh, but they didn't record it in my green book, should they have?"

Her: "What? Oh that's not right... they have to record everything in that book, in fact they usually don't want to know you with out it!"

Me: "Oh no, so what does that mean?"

Her: "I'll ring them and see if they have your new results and I'll call you back, but the only thing is, that if the results are extremely elevated, you may have to get a new midwife, a specialist."

(Me thinking... well damn... lets hope the results are bad then!!!!"

Me: "Thank you for calling, I appreciate it!"

So I waited for ages for my phone call, but I was really ticked off at how slack she had been and I rang Mum to have a winge about it LOL! But just as Mum answered I got call wait, and so I had to call Mum back.

It was Slackbitch with the results...

Her: "It's me... everything is clear!"

Me: "Pardon?... Whats clear?"

Her: "Your results from the glucose test! It's all normal and nothing to worry about!"

Me: "But... I was told that I was pretty much guaranteed to have it!? I don't understand?"

Her: "Yeah! Weird isn't it! I was so sure there was no getting out of it... I don't know what the hell was going on with you that day when I took your test!"

Me: " Ummm sooo... what were the results exactly?"

Her: "Fasting test came back 3.9, glucose test came back 9, and the last test came back 6.8 So you're fine!"

Me: "But isn't 9 a little a high?"

Her: "Ummm I don't know... I doubt it... I don't think they care about the second reading, they only care about the first and last, so you're fine!"

Me: "But you're not sure? Sorry I'm just confused."

Her: "Look I'll ring again to double check that the middle reading is not a concern, and I'll let you know!"

Me: "Ok thanks."

Meantime I ring Mum to tell her the results are clear... she's in disbelief too as she has been with me through this whole process and has even noticed symptoms in myself that are signs of diabetes (and she would know... she has them!)

Then Slackbitch calls back for the last time...

Her: "Yep! The second reading doesn't matter... everything's fine, What's better is you don't have to get another midwife!"

Me: "Great!" (in a sarcastic manner!)

So after all that... apparently I'm in the clear!!!

With all the dramas that went on, we were a little concerned that maybe something coud have gone wrong as the process was very rushed and I felt not taken as seriously as it should have been.

So Mum and I decided to put it to the test ourselves.

I borrowed Mum's glucose blood tester (where you prick your finger and test the sugar level in your blood) and I got to testing!

I tested first thing in the morning when I woke up, and it read back 2.5! (Very low, especially concidering the difference from 9.5!)

Then I had a glass of milo and 2 hours later I tested again... it read back 8.6! (Too high, especially for just having a milo!)

Then 2 hours after having two slices of toast with apricot jam... it read back 9.4! (Way too high!)

So something is definately wrong... and we will be getting a second opinion!

The hospital results may very well have been right, but it's better to be safe then sorry I say! Because this is serious... there is a baby at risk!

And I'm going to take it very easy anyway and keep my diet healthy and avoid too much sugar.. just in case!!!

So fingers crossed!!!

xx